KOKORO: Is Ambition Compatible with Self-Love?
Is Ambition Compatible with Self-Love?
Welcome to Kokoro, where twice a month I send you thoughtfully chosen resources to help you get more of what you want through empowered decision making and improved self talk.
In this issue:
- Tofu Magic
- Workout Obsession
- Ambition from a Base of Self-Love
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Want to grab time with me? You can do that here too.
-Erin
P.S. Did you know I have a website? Probably not, because it’s brand new!
I’d love for you to take a peek: erinwarner.
1. Transforming Tofu
I’m fascinated by tofu. It’s so weird. And so versatile. From crispy to chewy to creamy, is there anything it can’t do?
In Tokyo, they even make tofu fresh from soy milk right at the table. Has anyone done that? It’s on my bucket list.
Through the magic of Kokoro (and the last issue where I shared a tofu-based recipe), I discovered that this love is shared by someone I deeply admire, Tamara Graham. She’s teaching an online course on May 20 called Transforming Tofu. You’ll learn the differences between silken, soft, medium, firm, and extra-firm tofu, how to store it properly, and how to cook it in surprising ways.
If you’re tofu-curious, this is a great entry point.
2. Science in a Suitcase
Nicole Richard, an amazing woman in my life, founded Science in a Suitcase, a non-profit bringing robotics and hands-on STEM learning to students in under-resourced communities.
In rural Kenya, students who had never left their communities are now traveling internationally to compete in robotics competitions.
It changes what they believe is possible in their lives.
And the impact doesn’t stop there.
Scholarships.
Investment in school infrastructure.
Opportunities that ripple out into families and entire communities.
If your curiosity is piqued, go take a look!
3. My Workout Obsession
When I want a workout, I know exactly where to go: Kat B Fit. With hand weights in my living room, liter bottles of water in an Airbnb in Italy, and no weights at all in plenty of hotel rooms, Kat B Fit keeps me moving.
What’s brilliant about her workouts: there’s one exercise per slide, so you go at your own pace. Take as long as you need to do the reps, find your balance, or honestly, check out Kat’s cute workout outfits. You do you!
Some movements, especially the balance ones, are tricky. But that’s part of what makes it so good for your brain. It’s a mental puzzle as much as a physical challenge.
Try it and let me know what you think!
Is Ambition Compatible with Self-Love?
If you don’t know Alex Hormozi, picture this: devoted husband, $100M+ business portfolio built before age 35, writes influential books about how to wildly succeed in business, works out religiously, only wears gym clothes (as far as I can tell), and seems like someone who doesn’t ask for permission to be big.
I watched Alex Hormozi interview Tony Robbins recently, and did not expect him to admit that when he views all he has accomplished, he feels apathetic.
Despite everything he’s built, something feels hollow.
Hormozi putting this on the table publicly matters.
If someone with that level of success can sit across from Tony Robbins and say, something is missing…
Then maybe the rest of us can admit it too.
Here’s the pattern I see with ambitious people:
We’re excellent at accomplishing things.
We’re less excellent at enjoying it.
In my experience, what’s happening is this:
We are outsourcing our self-worth to our results.
Old strategy: I’ll feel good about myself when I achieve X.
New strategy: I want to create something that expresses my unique voice, vision, gifts, and experience.
With the new strategy, the wins land.
The losses don’t take you down with them.
The outcome doesn’t tell you who you are and if you matter.
Try this: Think about a goal that matters to you right now.
Get honest about what’s underneath it.
Is it, “I need this to feel like enough”?
Or is it, “I want to build something that feels true”?
Because if the drive is to prove yourself…no outcome will fully satisfy.
But if the drive is self-expression…now you’ve changed the rules of the game.
Now you’re playing by your own rules.
This is ambition from a base of self-love.
WRAPPING UP…
Before you go: Here’s how I can help…
My work is focused on helping ambitious people, including many men ages 30 to 60, align their head and self-talk with their deepest-held desire, so they can achieve more, build the relationships they want, and bring their unique gifts to the world.
If you’ve been successful most of your life, but hit a ceiling or don’t feel the fulfillment you thought you would, I offer…
- 8-session Self Love and Empowerment Program
- 1-1 Coaching
- Group Cohorts
- and Corporate Training
I also set aside free office hours specifically for readers of this email.
If you’d like to connect and chat about where you’re headed, grab time with me here.
Don’t forget to check out my new website! erinwarner.net
Until next time,
-Erin